I love the rides at Disney World, and yet in an ironic twist of fate I feel nauseous on basically anything more ambitious than Winnie the Pooh. I am also irrationally terrified of Splash Mountain, which made for a very interesting experience last September.

It was our first day in Magic Kingdom and Splash was at the top of everyone’s list, so I figured I had to pull it together and go on. As we neared the front of the line I realized there was a very big possibility of getting the first row. My hands were starting to sweat. My sister, Meredith, was smiling with excitement and I was seriously considering bailing on the whole thing. However, I would sit next to my dad and I’d be fine.

Upon getting in the actual seat I realized that the size differential between my dad and I was causing the bar to not have a snug fit against my lap. Panic was setting in and I literally felt like I was 8 years old. I figured little kids go on this, I’ve BEEN on it, I will be ok.

Here is my brave face but in reality I was about to have a full blown freak out.

So the ride starts and now the anticipation and stress are building to irrational levels. By the time we got to the final drop I was sweating bullets.

Holding on for dear life.

I don’t know what came over me, but after it was over I was laughing, crying, sweating, and just happy it was all over. What in the world is wrong with me?

You can’t see, but there were legit tears.

This got me thinking about all the other ridiculous things that have happened to me on rides. Which leads me to the reel of embarrassing ride pictures, since what’s the point of a blog if you can’t put up unflattering pictures of yourself for the amusement of others?

Here is Mine Train and Slinky Dog. You would have thought these were like Kingda Ka at Six Flags, but no… just your average kiddie coasters in Disney World.

My hands were sweating so badly the handlebar was soaking wet. Guys, the ride is ONE MINUTE long and it’s basically for 5 year olds. My partner in the travel agency, Tori, is next to me. This is why we get along so well, she’s no better on rides than I am – look at that death grip she has going on.
Terrified.
Oh wait, I think I cried on Slinky Dog also.

Next up Flight of Passage. Premier ride in Disney. Must do and obviously I had to give it a try. It did not go well for me. Half way in my strategy to prevent blowing chunks was to close my eyes and breathe through my mouth. Mike had to escort me off the ride and get me a soda. It was a 30 minute recovery time and he was laughing and taking pictures.

This was a big improvement from the time I thought it was a good idea to go on Tower of Terror and Rock n Rollercoaster back to back. I seriously thought I had to go to the hospital and laid on a random cement wall in Hollywood Studios for two hours. My father in law brought me back to life with Gaviscon and Advil.

This is not the face of someone having a magical experience. Everyone else looks totally normal. My brother in law looks like he’s hanging out at a party. I don’t get it.
It seemed like a good idea after Tower of Terror, but it was most definitely not.

So now when I’m in Disney I’m the cruise director, making sure everyone in my family gets to go on everything they want. I go on what I can, I wait with the strollers, I work if I need to, and I enjoy being in the sun. I watch the excitement on my kids’ faces as they come off the rides and feel the adrenaline rush. For me, that’s just as good.

My favorite ride is Soarin’ and I can pull off Test Track as long as I have an empty stomach. Dinosaur is ok, and Everest was a one and done about 15 years ago. Star Tours and Mission Space – never going near those two. For anyone in the same boat as me – try the herbal motion sickness patches from Amazon.com. For everyone else – be happy you don’t ever feel like this!

by Ellen Volpe – Co-Owner of ET Family Travel